Rant

I feel like I am playing better than I ever have but continue to get crushed by 2 and 3 outers when all of the chips are in. The play is so bad and I am continually getting my money in good and losing. I don't know how people can make the calls they are making with such marginal hands. And I mean calling, not raising or 3 betting but actually calling off their chips to a big reraise w/A rag or K5dd. Do I have to start playing like this to start winning again? I could never make the calls these guys do but they hit. I've had pretty good success in MTT's in the past but recently can't seem to get deep in anything. My style used to be what I thought was tight solid but I realized I was very passive. I would often end up at the money bubble as the short stack and have to win a lot of races to get deep. I was leaving a lot of chips on the table but I was still getting deep and winning money. After watching other successful players, I opened up my game and started taking down pots that I never would have in the past. But now I can't win a race when I need to or I isolate a raiser from the sb w/QQ and bb wakes up w/aa or calls off 3/4 of his stack w/a6 and hits. I try to keep a positive attitude and know that it is variance and things will turn around. But damn man the bad beats just don't stop and I know they are coming. Fairly deep in the 28k, I flop the nut flush from the bb in a 4 handed limped pot. UTG limper bets out and I check raise, cuz the way I'm running I don't want him to see any more cards. He reraises all in w/top pair (9) queen kicker and no flush draw. Well I know I'm fucked and he hits runner runner for a boat. It just seems so stupid. I can't win with sm pairs vs. overs, can't win w/overs vs. sm pairs. WTF do I do. Well, I won't be playing for a while since I donked most of my bankroll in Vegas and now at Full Tilt. A lot of expenses right now with kids going back to school, sports, and other things. Maybe I should try the Chris Ferguson experiment and freeroll to 10k. I've got a rakeback freeroll at the end of the month, hopefully I can do something in it.